Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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