just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Randomize
