Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Randomize
