So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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