Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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