She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
