YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
