I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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