Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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