Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
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