why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
