Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I AM VODKA MAN
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
