This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize
