I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize
