I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
