well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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