Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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