I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize