Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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