Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
