i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
