just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
