Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
