im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
This gyro tastes like lonliness
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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