I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
