So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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