also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
