as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
