can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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