i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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