Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
