What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
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