Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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