is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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