He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Randomize
