Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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