just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
