How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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