Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
