Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
