Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
