You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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