im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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