Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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