GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
