worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
