he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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