Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
