I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize