It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i jhust puked up my retainher.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
