I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
